At a loss

The other night my heart just broke. I sat in Adrianna’s bed with her and just cried. I had no words to say, nothing to help make her feel better, my mind a blank, I had no mom words that would bring her comfort or explain why she was being this way.

She is starting now to have a really hard time with her arm since she broke it over a month ago. She is unable to be in a cast due to a reaction to the cast, which caused a severe skin infection. That has finally cleared up but she is still under strict doctors orders to have no physical activity.

There is the problem. She is bored.

At school during free time her friends go play on the playground and no one wants to just sit and talk to her. The same thing in P.E. she just sits there watching everyone else play. She didn’t even really like P.E. but now that she can’t do it she misses it. At home she is aggravated and frustrated that the other kids want to play, and they do, they also have cheer practice, wrestling practice and she doesn’t have anything. She read over 54 books last month and has already read 40 this month so far. I have bought her a couple more TAG books to go with the pen her Nana & Pawpaw got her for Christmas last year, also new coloring books, but she wants to get up and go.

The result she is being very difficult, not listening to Mike or me, arguing and fighting with Kasey, Conner, and Wesley so they have no interest in being around her when she acts this way.

That night when she was sent to bed early for fighting with Wesley she broke. She cried and was so upset at how she was acting. She said she doesn’t like herself and the way she is acting but she said she just wants to play with everyone else and not be left out.

I had no words, just my arms to wrap around her and hold her as I told her how much her daddy and I love her. More importantly I reminded her how much her heavenly father loves her and understands what she is going through and everything will be okay.